The Best Way to Help Your Child Cope with Divorce Depends on Their Age
Posted on: July 9, 2019
For parents, getting a divorce comes with all the pain they are experiencing personally coupled with the knowledge that they will also be putting their children through a tough time. They often wonder how to help their child through it. The answer depends on a number of factors, including how old the child is.
Helping Infants Deal with Divorce
In some ways, it is easier on an infant when parents divorce than it is on an older child but it can still be complicated. Overnight visits may not work until the child is bottle fed. If the child is breastfeeding and will not take a bottle, then having the father visit regularly can help the child become comfortable with their father until they can start overnight visits. These bonding visits can be very important.
Helping Toddlers and Preschool-Aged Children Deal with Divorce
If a child goes to daycare, preschool, or is otherwise used to being watched by a non-family member outside of their home, then they may not be affected much by the divorce at all. However, if one parent has been staying home with the child and that parent has to go to work, then the child may have issues dealing with the significant change of daycare or preschool.
Know that children are adaptable. No matter how upset they may initially seem, they are likely to be entirely over it within a month. Make sure that you are making the best possible child care decisions for your child. Be honest with your child and tell them what they should expect. If you share custody, try to keep your homes as consistent as possible. For example, have the same bath time, the same bedtime ritual, etc.
Helping Elementary-Aged Children Deal with Divorce
For children in elementary school, the key is reassuring them that the divorce is not their fault. Do not talk badly about their other parent. Spend lots of quality time with them, and be honest with them about the ways their life is going to change. They are likely to handle the situation better if they can prepare themselves for what is coming.
Helping Teenagers Deal with Divorce
If your teenager has a hard time dealing with your divorce, there are a few things you can do. First, tell them that you still love them and that this will not change that. Try to work with your ex to have a united front so your teen does not use the divorce against you. When it comes time to make custody agreements, allow your teen to express their opinion if they have one, but do not force them to choose sides if they would rather keep quiet.
At Law Office of Michael L. Fell we cannot provide family therapy but we can work on the legal aspect of your case. Call us now at (949) 585-9055 and request a free legal consultation.
